Sunday 12 March 2017

Love Horoscope for the Week of March 13


Let’s be honest with each other here, people: this is a “Love Horoscope,” and as such we need to discuss certain things involving relationships in a mature manner. Romance is nice, sure… but this week we need to discuss something much more adult in nature. I refer of course to alcohol. Well, that and sex — but have you noticed how often those two travel together? This week’s astrological (and calendrical) forces will combine for plenty of one or the other (or both).

Mars continues to amble its way through Taurus. A lot of traditional descriptions of this placement refer to the usually slow and plodding nature of the Bull, punctuated by the occasional outburst of stampeding rage. That’s generally pretty accurate, but let’s not forget that Mars in Taurus is also pretty sensual and is quite fond of sex. That sounds like fun, sure… but a frustrated, charging Bull rarely makes the smartest decisions for itself. Be careful who you charge into bed with this week, since Mars is relatively unaspected. An unaspected Mars doesn’t have much holding it back, and Mars in Taurus needs to be kept in a well-fenced paddock.

Mercury enters Aries on Monday. Whereas Mercury in Pisces was well-suited to romance and seduction, Mercury in Aries is a lot better at pick-up lines and sexting. In general, between now and the end of the month, think twice before you speak your mind. Then, after careful consideration, you may want to hold off for a while anyway: any planet in Aries will tend to be impulsive, but Mercury often leaves a written record of its malfunctions. This is not something you need in your file when the Annual Review at work comes around.

The wrong words uttered at the wrong time is never a good idea, but when the Sun is conjunct Chiron (exact on Tuesday but felt throughout the week) there are extra opportunities for you to hurt someone’s feelings (or for someone to hurt yours) on a much more deeply personal level than usual.

Friday is St. Patrick’s Day, which is a traditional celebration of Irish ethnic stereotypes. Regularly-scheduled events for this day include green clothing, green beer, and (later in the evening) green vomit. This is usually a boisterous day, but this Friday also features Sun square Saturn (in effect throughout the second half of the week). Sun square Saturn can make for additional moodiness and irritability, which is exactly the thing St. Patrick’s day didn’t need. Combined with Moon in Sagittarius (which starts on Friday evening) and the not-always-justified friendliness and creative thinking that comes from Mercury conjunct Venus (exact on Saturday), and you’ve got a fun-loving weekend all laid out for you. That is, provided that “unwise drunken hook-ups” and “pointless arguments over obscure or irrelevant personal positions” are the kind of fun that you love.

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