Finding Your Parents In Your Birth Chart

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Your relationship with your parents is your partnership template. When examining relationship patterns, parents are often the first subject that comes up. How you experience Mom and Dad is indicated in the natal chart. Your Sun (and Saturn) describe your father, and the condition of your Moon describes your mother. Note the phrase “How you experience…” While the natal chart reveals facts about your childhood (the love or abuse you received will show up very clearly) it is also a subjective filter.

Moon

Your Moon describes baseline needs and emotional expression, but its natal condition also describes your perception of the care and comfort received from your mother. Sign placement alone will have something to say about this, although it’s just the tip of the iceberg. Your Capricorn Moon can describe a cool, controlling mother. When siblings have Moons in different signs, it indicates their different experiences of mother. For example, Capricorn Moon has a Pisces Moon sibling. Mom may have failed to set boundaries with Pisces; the rules she insisted on for her Capricorn child somehow dissolved with Pisces Moon.

But Moon sign is only one indicator, and it paints a very simplistic picture. For a full description, you need to look at house placement and aspects to other planets. A 10th House Moon in Pisces, conjunct Neptune, suggest that you found Mom to be domineering. This is due to the Moon’s placement at the top of your chart. But she was not domineering in a typical way. The conjunction to Neptune in Pisces suggests she may have been weakened due to illness. Maybe she was an alcoholic, or suffered from depression. She may or may not have been codependent, but you felt that she needed your care. Her issues dominate your life. Any corresponding habits you have — involving surrender, helplessness, depression or addiction — will dominate your relationships. Looking at the positive side of this, perhaps you learned a tremendous amount of compassion and empathy from your mother, and these qualities rule your life.

A trine between your Moon and Pluto suggests a powerful mother. The harmony of the trine can indicate a supportive relationship with her. Let’s say you have a 2nd House Taurus Moon, trine 6th House Pluto in Virgo. Perhaps she enabled your self-esteem and security (2nd House) through her determined and insightful approach to your medical issues. Moon/Pluto in any aspect is transformative — there may have been a crisis in your childhood. Maybe you were quite ill and almost died, but she stayed by your side in the hospital, and then gently but relentlessly nursed you back to health once you came home. The resulting impact on your future relationships can be seen, as you approach them with a stability (Taurus) born from having survived the worst.

Sun

Your Sun describes your ego and conscious will, and also your experience of your father. Sign will have something to say about Dad’s qualities, but house placement and aspects fill in the complete picture. Your Sun in 1st House Aries opposite Saturn in 7th House Libra suggests that Dad played a major role in defining (Saturn) your identity (1st House). But that definition is a result of your perception of his disapproval and judgements. Perhaps he was an assertive (Aries) guy who pushed you to be your best. At least, that’s what he thought he was doing. But you experienced this as never being good enough, no matter how hard you tried. Hence, your lifelong struggles with lack of confidence and fear of failure.

The 1st/7th House axis indicates that you project his judgements onto your partners. There may be a direct correlation with how you viewed your parents’ marriage (Dad was the boss). Perhaps you project your authority onto your partner. You’re drawn to successful partners, even though success continues to elude you. The positive side of this aspect is your potential to dig in and persevere. However, this will only happen once you push past the internal voice that says you’re not good enough.

By itself, natal Saturn can also indicate your childhood experience of your father. Saturn in hard aspect to Mars often indicates growing up with physical hardship, such as extreme discipline meted out by Dad. The condition of your Saturn in general will describe how you experienced paternal authority and rules. However, Moon in hard aspect to Saturn will indicate an authoritative or repressive mother (as well as your loyalty and resentment towards her).

Sun and Moon

Aspects between your Sun and Moon can describe the state of your parents’ marriage. Again, the emphasis is on how you experienced it, which may not always reflect the actual state of the marriage. For example, you have a trine between your Sun and Moon, but your parents are divorced. And yet, they managed to put aside their difficulties and work together to raise you. This will manifest as harmony between your ego and emotions, giving you a solid approach to future relationships. You developed this by observing how your parents made it work.

Sometimes the separative aspect of a Sun/Moon opposition can describe divorced parents. But parents who remain unhappily married can also be seen in the opposition. Their tension will be translated to you, as you’re torn between opposing priorities in life. And, you may be drawn to partners who exacerbate this tension. A Sun/Moon conjunction can indicate that Mom and Dad presented a united front for you. But if that conjunction is challenged by a hard aspect to any other planet, it also indicates conflict in the marriage. Sun/Moon square Mars/Saturn suggests deadlocked arguments, and staying together out of a sense of duty (to you). As a result, you develop a set focus (Sun/Moon) defined (Saturn) by their fights. Maybe you become a defensively stubborn partner who knows what you want, but also expects the worst from relationships.

Related: Moon Square Venus in a Woman’s Chart: Conflicts at the Heart of Being Female

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